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CHAPTER XI.
MRS. EDWARDS. HER SOLEMN SELF-DEDICATIONS HER UNCOMMON DISCOVERIES OF
THE DIVINE PERFECTIONS AND GLORY; AND OF THE EXCELLENCY OF CHRIST
REMARKS CONCERNING THEM.
In speaking of Mrs. Edwards, we have already had occasion to remark,
that her piety appears to have been in no ordinary degree pure,
intense, and elevated, and that her views of spiritual and heavenly
things were uncommonly clear and joyful. Near the close of the year
1738, according to the testimony of Mr. Edwards, she was led, under an
uncommon discovery of God's excellency, and in an high exercise of
love to God, and of rest and joy in him, to make a new and most solemn
dedication of herself to his service and glory, an entire renunciation
of the world, and a resignation of all to God. After this, she had
often such views of the glory of the divine perfections, and of
Christ's excellencies, and at times, for hours together, without any
interruption, that she was overwhelmed, and as it were swallowed up,
in the light and joy of the love of God. In the summer of 1740, after
a new and more perfect resignation of herself to God, with yet greater
fervency, her views of the glory of God, and of the excellency of
Christ, became still more clear and transporting; and in the following
winter, after a similar but more perfect resignation of herself, and
acceptance of God as the only portion and happiness of her soul, God
appeared to vouchsafe to her, for a long period, a degree of spiritual
light and enjoyment, which seemed to be, in reality, an anticipation
of the joys of the heavenly world. There was so much that was unusual
and striking in this state of mind, that her husband requested her to
draw up an exact statement of it; which, having been preserved, is now
presented to the reader.
"On Tuesday night, Jan. 19, 1742," observes Mrs. Edwards, "I felt very
uneasy and unhappy, at my being so low in grace. I thought I very much
needed help from God, and found a spirit of earnestness to seek help
of him, that I might have more holiness. When I had for a time been
earnestly wrestling with God for it, I felt within myself great
quietness of spirit, unusual submission to God, and willingness to
wait upon him, with respect to the time and manner in which he should
help me, and wished that he should take his own time, and his own way,
to do it.
"The next morning I found a degree of uneasiness in my mind, at Mr.
Edwards's suggesting, that he thought I had failed in some measure in
point of prudence, in some conversation I had with Mr. Williams, of
Hadley, the day before. I found, that it seemed to bereave me of the
quietness and calm of my mind, in any respect not to have the good
opinion of my husband. This, I much disliked in myself, as arguing a
want of a sufficient rest in God, and felt a disposition to fight
against it, and look to God for his help, that I might have a more
full and entire rest in him, independent of all other things. I
continued in this frame, from early in the morning until about 10
o'clock, at which time the Rev. Mr. Reynolds went to prayer in the
family.
"I had, before this, so entirely given myself up to God, and resigned
up every thing into his hands, that I had, for a long time, felt
myself quite alone in the world; so that the peace and calm of my
mind, and my rest in God, as my only and all-sufficient happiness,
seemed sensibly above the reach of disturbance from any thing but
these two: 1st. My own good name and fair reputation among men, and
especially the esteem and just treatment of the people of this town;
2dly. And more especially, the esteem, and love, and kind treatment of
my husband. At times, indeed, I had seemed to be considerable elevated
above the influence of even these things; yet I had not found my calm,
and peace, and rest in God so sensibly, fully, and constantly, above
the reach of disturbance from them, until now.
While Mr. Reynolds was at prayer in the family this morning, I felt an
earnest desire that, in calling on God, he should say, Father, or that
he should address the Almighty under that appellation: on which the
thought turned in my mind.--Why can I say, Father?--Can I now at this
time, with the confidence of a child, and without the least misgiving
of heart, call God my Father?--This brought to my mind two lines of
Mr. Erskine's sonnet:
'I see him lay his vengeance by. `And smile in Jesus' face.'
"I was thus deeply sensible, that my sins did loudly call for
vengeance; but I then by faith saw God `lay his vengeance by, and
smile in Jesus' face.' It appeared to be real and certain that he did
so. I had not the least doubt, that he then sweetly smiled upon me,
with the look of forgiveness and love, having laid aside all his
displeasure towards me, for Jesus' sake; which made me feel very weak,
and somewhat faint.
"In consequence of this, I felt a strong desire to be alone with God,
to go to him, without having any one to interrupt the silent and soft
communion, which I earnestly desired between God and my own soul; and
accordingly withdrew to my chamber. It should have been mentioned
that, before I retired, while Mr. Reynolds was praying, these words,
in Rom. viii. 34. came into my mind, `Who is he that condemneth; it is
Christ that died, yea rather that is risen again, who is even at the
right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us;' as well as
the following words, `Who shall separate us from the love of Christ,'
&c.; which occasioned great sweetness and delight in my soul. But when
I was alone, the words came to my mind with far greater power and
sweetness; upon which I took the Bible, and read the words to the end
of the chapter, when they were impressed on my heart with vastly
greater power and sweetness still. They appeared to me with undoubted
certainty as the words of God, and as words which God did pronounce
concerning me. I had no more doubt of it, than I had of my being. I
seemed as it were to hear the great God proclaiming thus to the world
concerning me; `Who shall lay any thing to thy charge,' &c.; and had
it strongly impressed on me, how impossible it was for any thing in
heaven or earth, in this world or the future, ever to separate me from
the love of God which was in Christ Jesus. I cannot find language to
express, how certain this appeared--the everlasting mountains and
hills were but shadows to it. My safety, and happiness, and eternal
enjoyment of God's immutable love, seemed as durable and unchangeable
as God himself. Melted and overcome by the sweetness of this
assurance, I fell into a great flow of tears, and could not forbear
weeping aloud. It appeared certain to me that God was my Father, and
Christ my Lord and Saviour, that he was mine and I his. Under a
delightful sense of the immediate presence and love of God, these
words seemed to come over and over in my mind, `My God, my all; my
God, my all.' The presence of God was so near, and so real, that I
seemed scarcely conscious of any thing else. God the Father, and the
Lord Jesus Christ, seemed as distinct persons, both manifesting their
inconceivable loveliness, and mildness, and gentleness, and their
great and immutable love to me. I seemed to be taken under the care
and charge of my God and Saviour, in an inexpressibly endearing
manner; and Christ appeared to me as a mighty Saviour, under the
character of the Lion of the tribe of Judah, taking my heart, with all
its corruptions, under his care, and putting it at his feet. In all
things, which concerned me, I felt myself safe under the protection of
the Father and the Saviour; who appeared with supreme kindness to keep
a record of every thing that I did, and of every thing that was done
to me, purely for my good.
"The peace and happiness, which I hereupon felt, was altogether
inexpressible. It seemed to be that which came from heaven; to be
eternal and unchangeable. I seemed to be lifted above earth and hell,
out of the reach of every thing here below, so that I could look on
all the rage and enmity of men or devils, with a kind of holy
indifference, and an undisturbed tranquillity. At the same time, I
felt compassion and love for all mankind, and a deep abasement of
soul, under a sense of my own unworthiness. I thought of the ministers
who were in the house, and felt willing to undergo any labour and
self-denial, if they would but come to the help of the Lord. I also
felt myself more perfectly weaned from all things here below, than
ever before. The whole world, with all its enjoyments, and all its
troubles, seemed to be nothing:--My God was my all, my only portion.
No possible suffering appeared to be worth regarding: all persecutions
and torments were a mere nothing. I seemed to dwell on high, and the
place of defence to be the munition of rocks.
"After some time, the two evils mentioned above, as those which I
should have been least able to bear, came to my mind--the ill
treatment of the town, and the ill will of my husband; but now I was
carried exceedingly above even such things as these, and I could feel
that, if I were exposed to them both, they would seem comparatively
nothing. There was then a deep snow on the ground, and I could think
of being driven from my home into the cold and snow, of being chased
from the town with the utmost contempt and malice, and of being left
to perish with the cold, as cast out by all the world, with perfect
calmness and serenity. It appeared to me, that it would not move me,
or in the least disturb the inexpressible happiness and peace of my
soul. My mind seemed as much above all such things, as the sun is
above the earth.
"I continued in a very sweet and lively sense of divine things, day
and night, sleeping and waking, until Saturday, Jan. 23. On Saturday
morning, I had a most solemn and deep impression on my mind of the eye
of God as fixed upon me, to observe what improvement I made of those
spiritual communications I had received from him; as well as of the
respect shown Mr. Edwards, who had then been sent for to preach at
Leicester. I was sensible that I was sinful enough to bestow it on my
pride, or on my sloth, which seemed exceedingly dreadful to me. At
night, my soul seemed to be filled with an inexpressibly sweet and
pure love to God, and to the children of God; with a refreshing
consolation and solace of soul, which made me willing to lie on the
earth, at the feet of the servants of God, to declare his gracious
dealings with me, and breathe forth before them my love, and
gratitude, and praise.
"The next day, which was the sabbath, I enjoyed a sweet, and lively,
and assured sense of God's infinite grace, and favour, and love to me,
in taking me out of the depths of hell, and exalting me to the
heavenly glory, and the dignity of a royal priesthood.
"On Monday night, Mr. Edwards, being gone that day to Leicester, I
heard that Mr. Buell was coming to this town, and from what I had
heard of him, and of his success, I had strong hopes that there would
be great effects from his labours here. At the same time, I had a deep
and affecting impression, that the eye of God was ever upon my heart,
and that it greatly concerned me to watch my heart, and see to it that
I was perfectly resigned to God, with respect to the instruments he
should make use of to revive religion in this town, and be entirely
willing, if it was God's pleasure, that he should make use of Mr.
Buell; and also that other Christians should appear to excel me in
christian experience, and in the benefit they should derive from
ministers. I was conscious, that it would be exceedingly provoking to
God if I should not be thus resigned, and earnestly endeavoured to
watch my heart, that no feelings of a contrary nature might arise; and
was enabled, as I thought, to exercise full resignation, and
acquiescence in God's pleasure, as to these things. I was sensible
what great cause I had to bless God, for the use he had made of Mr.
Edwards hitherto; but thought, if he never blessed his labours any
more, and should greatly bless the labours of other ministers, I could
entirely acquiesce in his will. It appeared to me meet and proper,
that God should employ babes and sucklings to advance his kingdom.
When I thought of these things, it was my instinctive feeling to say,
`Amen, Lord Jesus! Amen, Lord Jesus!' This seemed to be the sweet and
instinctive language of my soul.
"On Tuesday, I remained in a sweet and lively exercise of this
resignation, and love to and rest in God, seeming to be in my heart
from day to day, far above the reach of every thing here below. On
Tuesday night, especially the latter part of it, I felt a great
earnestness of soul and engagedness in seeking God for the town, that
religion might now revive, and that God would bless Mr. Buell to that
end. God seemed to be very near to me while I was thus striving with
him for these things, and I had a strong hope that what I sought of
him would be granted. There seemed naturally and unavoidably to arise
in my mind an assurance that now God would do great things for
Northampton.
"On Wednesday morning, I heard that Mr. Buell arrived the night before
at Mr. Phelps's, and that there seemed to be great tokens and effects
of the presence of God there, which greatly encouraged and rejoiced
me. About an hour and a half after, Mr. Buell came to our house; I sat
still in entire resignedness to God, and willingness that God should
bless his labours here as much as he pleased; though it were to the
enlivening of every saint, and to the conversion of every sinner, in
the town. These feelings continued afterwards, when I saw his great
success; as I never felt the least rising of heart to the contrary,
but my submission was even and uniform, without interruption or
disturbance. I rejoiced when I saw the honour which God put upon him,
and the respect paid him by the people, and the greater success
attending his preaching, than had followed the preaching of Mr.
Edwards immediately before he went to Leicester. I found rest and
rejoicing in it, and the sweet language of my soul continually was,
`Amen, Lord Jesus! Amen, Lord Jesus!'
"At 3 o'clock in the afternoon, a lecture was preached by Mr. Buell.
In the latter part of the sermon, one or two appeared much moved, and
after the blessing, when the people were going out, several others. To
my mind there was the clearest evidence, that God was present in the
congregation, on the work of redeeming love; and in the clear view of
this, I was all at once filled with such intense admiration of the
wonderful condescension and grace of God, in returning again to
Northampton, as overwhelmed my soul, and immediately took away my
bodily strength. This was accompanied with an earnest longing, that
those of us, who were the children of God, might now arise and strive.
It appeared to me, that the angels in heaven sung praises, for such
wonderful, free, and sovereign grace, and my heart was lifted up in
adoration and praise. I continued to have clear views of the future
world, of eternal happiness and misery, and my heart full of love to
the souls of men. On seeing some, that I found were in a natural
condition, I felt a most tender compassion for them; but especially
was I, while I remained in the meeting-house, from time to time
overcome, and my strength taken away, by the sight of one and another,
whom I regarded as the children of God, and who, I had heard, were
lively and animated in religion. We remained in the meeting-house
about three hours, after the public exercises were over. During most
of the time, my bodily strength was overcome; and the joy and
thankfulness, which were excited in my mind, as I contemplated the
great goodness of God, led me to converse with those who were near me,
in a very earnest manner.
"When I came home, I found Mr. Buell, Mr. Christophers, Mr. Hopkins,
Mrs. Eleanor Dwight, the wife of Mr. Joseph Allen, and Mr. Job Strong,
at the house. Seeing and conversing with them on the Divine goodness,
renewed my former feelings, and filled me with an intense desire that
we might all arise, and with an active, flowing, and fervent heart
give glory to God. The intenseness of my feelings again took away my
bodily strength. The words of one of Dr. Watts's Hosannas powerfully
affected me; and in the course of the conversation, I uttered them as
the real language of my heart, with great earnestness and emotion.
`Hosanna to King David's Son, Who reigns on a superior throne,' &c.
And while I was uttering the words, my mind was so deeply impressed
with the love of Christ, and a sense of his immediate presence, that I
could with difficulty refrain from rising from my seat, and leaping
for joy. I continued to enjoy this intense, and lively, and refreshing
sense of divine things, accompanied with strong emotions, for nearly
an hour; after which, I experienced a delightful calm, and peace and
rest in God, until I retired for the night; and during the night, both
waking and sleeping, I had joyful views of divine things, and a
complacential rest of soul in God. I awoke in the morning of Thursday,
Jan. 28th, in the same happy frame of mind, and engaged in the duties
of my family with a sweet consciousness, that God was present with me,
and with earnest longings of soul for the continuance and increase of
the blessed fruits of the Holy Spirit in the town. About nine o'clock,
these desires became so exceedingly intense, when I saw numbers of the
people coming into the house, with an appearance of deep interest in
religion, that my bodily strength was much weakened, and it was with
difficulty that I could pursue my ordinary avocations. About 11
o'clock, as I accidentally went into the room where Mr. Buell was
conversing with some of the people, I heard him say, `O that we, who
are the children of God, should be cold and lifeless in religion!' and
I felt such a sense of the deep ingratitude manifested by the children
of God, in such coldness and deadness, that my strength was
immediately taken away, and I sunk down on the spot. Those who were
near raised me, and placed me in a chair; and from the fulness of my
heart, I expressed to them, in a very earnest manner, the deep sense I
had of the wonderful grace of Christ towards me, of the assurance I
had of his having saved me from hell, of my happiness running parallel
with eternity, of the duty of giving up all to God, and of the peace
and joy inspired by an entire dependence on his mercy and grace. Mr.
Buell then read a melting hymn of Dr. Watts's, [24] concerning the
loveliness of Christ, the enjoyments and employments of heaven, and
the Christian's earnest desire of heavenly things; and the truth and
reality of the things mentioned in the hymn, made so strong an
impression on my mind, and my soul was drawn so powerfully towards
Christ and heaven, that I leaped unconsciously from my chair. I seemed
to be drawn upwards, soul and body, from the earth towards heaven; and
it appeared to me that I must naturally and necessarily ascend
thither. These feelings continued while the hymn was reading, and
during the prayer of Mr. Christophers, which followed. After the
prayer, Mr. Buell read two other hymns, on the glories of heaven,
which moved me so exceedingly, and drew me so strongly heavenward,
that it seemed as it were to draw my body upwards, and I felt as if I
must necessarily ascend thither. At length my strength failed me, and
I sunk down; when they took me up and laid me on the bed, where I lay
for a considerable time, faint with joy, while contemplating the
glories of the heavenly world. After I had lain a while, I felt more
perfectly subdued and weaned from the world, and more fully resigned
to God, than I had ever been conscious of before. I felt an entire
indifference to the opinions, and representations, and conduct of
mankind respecting me; and a perfect willingness, that God should
employ some other instrument than Mr. Edwards, in advancing the work
of grace in Northampton. I was entirely swallowed up in God, as my
only portion, and his honour and glory was the object of my supreme
desire and delight. At the same time, I felt a far greater love to the
children of God, than ever before. I seemed to love them as my own
soul; and when I saw them, my heart went out towards them, with an
inexpressible endearedness and sweetness. I beheld them by faith in
their risen and glorified state, with spiritual bodies re-fashioned
after the image of Christ's glorious body, and arrayed in the beauty
of heaven. The time when they would be so appeared very near, by faith
it seemed as if it were present. This was accompanied with a ravishing
sense of the unspeakable joys of the upper world. They appeared to my
mind in all their reality and certainty, and as it were in actual and
distinct vision; so plain and evident were they to the eye of my
faith, I seemed to regard them as begun. These anticipations were
renewed over and over, while I lay on the bed, from twelve o'clock
till four, being too much exhausted by emotions of joy, to rise and
sit up; and during most of the time, my feelings prompted me to
converse very earnestly with one and another of the pious women, who
were present, on those spiritual and heavenly objects, of which I had
so deep an impression. A little while before I arose, Mr. Buell and
the people went to meeting.
"I continued in a sweet and lively sense of divine things, until I
retired to rest. That night, which was Thursday night, Jan. 28, was
the sweetest night I ever had in my life. I never before, for so long
a time together, enjoyed so much of the light, and rest, and sweetness
of heaven in my soul, but without the least agitation of body during
the whole time. The great part of the night I lay awake, sometimes
asleep, and sometimes between sleeping and waking. But all night I
continued in a constant, clear, and lively sense of the heavenly
sweetness of Christ's excellent and transcendent love, of his nearness
to me, and of my dearness to him; with an inexpressibly sweet calmness
of soul in an entire rest in him. I seemed to myself to perceive a
glow of divine love come down from the heart of Christ in heaven, into
my heart, in a constant stream, like a stream or pencil of sweet
light. At the same time, my heart and soul all flowed out in love to
Christ; so that there seemed to be a constant flowing and reflowing of
heavenly and divine love, from Christ's heart to mine; and I appeared
to myself to float or swim, in these bright, sweet beams of the love
of Christ, like the motes swimming in the beams of the sun, or the
streams of his light which come in at the window. My soul remained in
a kind of heavenly elysium. So far as I am capable of making a
comparison, I think that what I felt each minute, during the
continuance of the whole time, was worth more than all the outward
comfort and pleasure, which I had enjoyed in my whole life put
together. It was a pure delight, which fed and satisfied the soul. It
was pleasure, without the least sting, or any interruption. It was a
sweetness, which my soul was lost in. It seemed to be all that my
feeble frame could sustain, of that fulness of joy, which is felt by
those, who behold the face of Christ, and share his love in the
heavenly world. There was but little difference, whether I was asleep
or awake, so deep was the impression made on my soul; but if there was
any difference, the sweetness was greatest and most uninterrupted
while I was asleep.
"As I awoke early the next morning, which was Friday, I was led to
think of Mr. Williams of Hadley preaching that day in the town, as had
been appointed; and to examine my heart, whether I was willing that
he, who was a neighbouring minister, should be extraordinarily
blessed, and made a greater instrument of good in the town, than Mr.
Edwards; and was enabled to say, with respect to that matter, `Amen,
Lord Jesus!' and to be entirely willing, if God pleased, that he
should be the instrument of converting every soul in the town. My soul
acquiesced fully in the will of God, as to the instrument, if his work
of renewing grace did but go on.
"This lively sense of the beauty and excellency of divine things
continued during the morning, accompanied with peculiar sweetness and
delight. To my own imagination, my soul seemed to be gone out of me to
God and Christ in heaven, and to have very little relation to my body.
God and Christ were so present to me, and so near me, that I seemed
removed from myself. The spiritual beauty of the Father and the
Saviour, seemed to engross my whole mind; and it was the instinctive
feeling of my heart, `Thou art; and there is none beside thee.' I
never felt such an entire emptiness of self-love, or any regard to any
private, selfish interest of my own. It seemed to me, that I had
entirely done with myself. I felt that the opinions of the world
concerning me were nothing, and that I had no more to do with any
outward interest of my own, than with that of a person whom I never
saw. The glory of God seemed to be all, and in all, and to swallow up
every wish and desire of my heart.
"Mr. Sheldon came into the house about 10 o'clock, and said to me as
he came in, `The Sun of righteousness arose on my soul this morning,
before day;' upon which I said to him in reply, `That Sun has not set
upon my soul all this night; I have dwelt on high in the heavenly
mansions; the light of divine love has surrounded me; my soul has been
lost in God, and has almost left the body.' This conversation only
served to give me a still livelier sense of the reality and excellence
of divine things, and that to such a degree, as again to take away my
strength, and occasion great agitation of body. So strong were my
feelings, I could not refrain from conversing with those around me, in
a very earnest manner, for about a quarter of an hour, on the infinite
riches of divine love in the work of salvation; when, my strength
entirely failing, my flesh grew very cold, and they carried me and set
me by the fire. As I sat there, I had a most affecting sense of the
mighty power of Christ, which had been exerted in what he had done for
my soul, and in sustaining and keeping down the native corruptions of
my heart, and of the glorious and wonderful grace of God in causing
the ark to return to Northampton. So intense were my feelings, when
speaking of these things, that I could not forbear rising up and
leaping with joy and exultation. I felt at the same time an
exceedingly strong and tender affection for the children of God, and
realized, in a manner exceedingly sweet and ravishing, the meaning of
Christ's prayer, in John xvii. 21. `That they all may be one, as thou
Father art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us.'
This union appeared to me an inconceivable, excellent, and sweet
oneness; and at the same time I felt that oneness in my soul, with the
children of God who were present. Mr. Christophers then read the hymn
out of the Penitential cries, beginning with
`My soul doth magnify the Lord, My spirit doth rejoice;'
The whole hymn was deeply affecting to my feelings: but when these
words were read,
`My sighs at length are turn'd to songs, The Comforter is come:'--
So conscious was I of the joyful presence of the Holy Spirit, I could
scarcely refrain from leaping with transports of joy. This happy frame
of mind continued until two o'clock, when Mr. Williams came in, and we
soon went to meeting. He preached on the subject of the assurance of
faith. The whole sermon was affecting to me, but especially when he
came to show the way in which assurance was obtained, and to point out
its happy fruits. When I heard him say, that those who have assurance,
have a foretaste of heavenly glory, I knew the truth of it from what I
then felt: I knew that I then tasted the clusters of the heavenly
Canaan: my soul was filled and overwhelmed with light, and love, and
joy in the Holy Ghost, and seemed just ready to go away from the body.
I could scarcely refrain from expressing my joy aloud, in the midst of
the service. I had, in the mean time, an overwhelming sense of the
glory of God, as the Great Eternal All, and of the happiness of having
my own will entirely subdued to his will. I knew that the foretaste of
glory, which I then had in my soul, came from him, that I certainly
should go to him, and should, as it were, drop into the Divine Being,
and be swallowed up in God.
"After meeting was done, the congregation waited while Mr. Buell went
home, to prepare to give them a lecture. It was almost dark before he
came, and, in the mean time, I conversed in a very earnest and joyful
manner, with those who were with me in the pew. My mind dwelt on the
thought, that the Lord God Omnipotent reigneth, and it appeared to me
that he was going to set up a reign of love on the earth, and that
heaven and earth were, as it were, coming together; which so
exceedingly moved me that I could not forbear expressing aloud, to
those near me, my exultation of soul. This subsided into a heavenly
calm, and a rest of soul in God, which was even sweeter than what
preceded it. Afterwards, Mr. Buell came and preached; and the same
happy frame of mind continued during the evening, and night, and the
next day. In the forenoon, I was thinking of the manner in which the
children of God had been treated in the world--particularly of their
being shut up in prison--and the folly of such attempts to make them
miserable, seemed to surprise me. It appeared astonishing, that men
should think, by this means, to injure those who had such a kingdom
within them. Towards night being informed that Mrs. P----had expressed
her fears lest I should die before Mr. Edwards's return, and he should
think the people had killed his wife; I told those who were present,
that I chose to die in the way that was most agreeable to God's will,
and that I should be willing to die in darkness and horror, if it was
most for the glory of God.
"In the evening, I read those chapters in John, which contain Christ's
dying discourse with his disciples, and his prayer with them. After I
had done reading, and was in my retirement, a little before bed-time,
thinking on what I had read, my soul was so filled with love to
Christ, and love to his people, that I fainted under the intenseness
of the feeling. I felt, while reading, a delightful acquiescence in
the petition to the Father--`I pray not that thou shouldst take them
out of the world, but that thou shouldst keep them from the evil.'
Though it seemed to me infinitely better to die to go to Christ, yet I
felt an entire willingness to continue in this world so long as God
pleased, to do and suffer what he would have me.
"After retiring to rest and sleeping a little while, I awoke and had a
very lively consciousness of God's being near me. I had an idea of a
shining way, or path of light, between heaven and my soul, somewhat as
on Thursday night, except that God seemed nearer to me, and as it were
close by, and the way seemed more open, and the communication more
immediate and more free. I lay awake most of the night, with a
constant delightful sense of God's great love and infinite
condescension, and with a continual view of God as near, and as my
God. My soul remained, as on Thursday night, in a kind of heavenly
elysium. Whether waking or sleeping, there was no interruption,
throughout the night, to the views of my soul, to its heavenly light,
and divine, inexpressible sweetness. It was without any agitation or
motion of the body. I was led to reflect on God's mercy to me, in
giving me, for many years, a willingness to die; and after that, for
more than two years past, in making me willing to live, that I might
do and suffer whatever he called me to here; whereas, before that, I
often used to feel impatient at the thought of living. This then
appeared to me, as it had often done before, what gave me much the
greatest sense of thankfulness to God. I also thought how God had
graciously given me, for a great while, an entire resignation to his
will, with respect to the kind and manner of death that I should die;
having been made willing to die on the rack, or at the stake, or any
other tormenting death, and, if it were God's will, to die in
darkness: and how I had that day been made very sensible and fully
willing, if it was God's pleasure and for his glory, to die in horror.
But now it occurred to me, that when I had thus been made willing to
live, and to be kept on this dark abode, I used to think of living no
longer than to the ordinary age of man. Upon this I was led to ask
myself, Whether I was not willing to be kept out of heaven even
longer; and my whole heart seemed immediately to reply, `Yes, a
thousand years, if it be God's will, and for his honour and glory:'
and then my heart, in the language of resignation, went further, and
with great alacrity and sweetness, to answer as it were over and over
again, `Yes, and live a thousand years in horror, if it be most for
the glory of God: yea, I am willing to live a thousand years a hell
upon earth, if it be most for the honour of God.' But then I
considered with myself, What this would be, to live a hell upon earth,
for so long a time; and I thought of the torment of my body being so
great, awful, and overwhelming, that none could bear to live in the
country where the spectacle was seen, and of the torment and horror of
my mind being vastly greater than the torment of my body; and it
seemed to me that I found a perfect willingness, and sweet quietness
and alacrity of soul, in consenting that it should be so, if it were
most for the glory of God; so that there was no hesitation, doubt, or
darkness in my mind, attending the thoughts of it, but my resignation
seemed to be clear, like a light that shone through my soul. I
continued saying, `Amen, Lord Jesus! Amen, Lord Jesus! glorify thyself
in me, in my body and my soul,'--with a calm and sweetness of soul,
which banished all reluctance. The glory of God seemed to overcome me
and swallow me up, and every conceivable suffering, and every thing
that was terrible to my nature, seemed to shrink to nothing before it.
This resignation continued in its clearness and brightness the rest of
the night, and all the next day, and the night following, and on
Monday in the forenoon, without interruption or abatement. All this
while, whenever I thought of it, the language of my soul was, with the
greatest fulness and alacrity, `Amen, Lord Jesus! Amen, Lord Jesus!'
In the afternoon of Monday, it was not quite so perceptible and
lively, but my mind remained so much in a similar frame, for more than
a week, that I could never think of it without an inexpressible
sweetness in my soul.
"After I had felt this resignation on Saturday night, for some time as
I lay in bed, I felt such a disposition to rejoice in God, that I
wished to have the world join me in praising him; and was ready to
wonder how the world of mankind could lie and sleep, when there was
such a God to praise, and rejoice in, and could scarcely forbear
calling out to those who were asleep in the house, to arise, and
rejoice, and praise God. When I arose on the morning of the sabbath, I
felt a love to all mankind, wholly peculiar in its strength and
sweetness, far beyond all that I had ever felt before. The power of
that love seemed to be inexpressible. I thought, if I were surrounded
by enemies, who were venting their malice and cruelty upon me, in
tormenting me, it would still be impossible that I should cherish any
feelings towards them but those of love, and pity, and ardent desires
for their happiness. At the same time I thought, if I were cast off by
my nearest and dearest friends, and if the feelings and conduct of my
husband were to be changed from tenderness and affection, to extreme
hatred and cruelty, and that every day, I could so rest in God, that
it would not touch my heart, or diminish my happiness. I could still
go on with alacrity in the performance of every act of duty, and my
happiness remain undiminished and entire.
"I never before felt so far from a disposition to judge and censure
others, with respect to the state of their hearts, their sincerity, or
their attainments in holiness, as I did that morning. To do this,
seemed abhorrent to every feeling of my heart. I realized also, in an
unusual and very lively manner, how great a part of Christianity lies
in the performance of our social and relative duties to one another.
The same lively and joyful sense of spiritual and divine things
continued throughout the day--a sweet love to God and all mankind, and
such an entire rest of soul in God, that it seemed as if nothing that
could be said of me, or done to me, could touch my heart, or disturb
my enjoyment. The road between heaven and my soul seemed open and
wide, all the day long; and the consciousness I had of the reality and
excellence of heavenly things was so clear, and the affections they
excited so intense, that it overcame my strength, and kept my body
weak and faint, the great part of the day, so that I could not stand
or go without help. The night also was comforting and refreshing.
"This delightful frame of mind was continued on Monday. About noon,
one of the neighbours who was conversing with me, expressed himself
thus, `One smile from Christ is worth a thousand million pounds,' and
the words affected me exceedingly, and in a manner which I cannot
express. I had a strong sense of the infinite worth of Christ's
approbation and love, and at the same time of the grossness of the
comparison; and it only astonished me, that any one could compare a
smile of Christ to any earthly treasure.--Towards night, I had a deep
sense of the awful greatness of God, and felt with what humility and
reverence we ought to behave ourselves before him. Just then Mr. W
----came in, and spoke with a somewhat light, smiling air, of the
flourishing state of religion in the town; which I could scarcely bear
to see. It seemed to me, that we ought greatly to revere the presence
of God, and to behave ourselves with the utmost solemnity and
humility, when so great and holy a God was so remarkably present, and
to rejoice before him with trembling.--In the evening, these words, in
the Penitential Cries,--`The Comforter is come!'--were accompanied to
my soul with such conscious certainty, and such intense joy, that
immediately it took away my strength, and I was falling to the floor;
when some of those who were near me caught me and held me up. And when
I repeated the words to the by-standers, the strength of my feelings
was increased. The name--`The Comforter'--seemed to denote that the
Holy Spirit was the only and infinite Fountain of comfort and joy, and
this seemed real and certain to my mind. These words--`the
comforter'--seemed as it were immensely great, enough to fill heaven
and earth.
"On Tuesday after dinner, Mr. Buell, as he sat at table, began to
discourse about the glories of the upper world; which greatly affected
me, so as to take away my strength. The views and feelings of the
preceding evening, respecting the Great Comforter, were renewed in the
most lively and joyful manner; so that my limbs grew cold, and I
continued to a considerable degree overcome for about an hour,
earnestly expressing to those around me, my deep and joyful sense of
the presence and divine excellence of the Comforter, and of the
glories of heaven.
"It was either on Tuesday or Wednesday, that Mr. W ----came to the
house, and informed what account Mr. Lyman, who was just then come
from Leicester, on his way from Boston, gave of Mr. Edwards's success,
in making peace and promoting religion at Leicester. The intelligence
inspired me with such an admiring sense of the great goodness of God,
in using Mr. Edwards as the instrument of doing good, and promoting
the work of salvation, that it immediately overcame me, and took away
my strength, so that I could no longer stand on my feet. On Wednesday
night, Mr. Clark, coming in with Mr. Buell and some of the people,
asked me how I felt. I told him that I did not feel at all times
alike, but this I thought I could say, that I had given up all to God;
and there is nothing like it, nothing like giving all up to him,
esteeming all to be his, and resigning all at his call. I told him
that, many a time within a twelvemonth, I had asked myself when I lay
down, How I should feel, if our house and all our property in it
should be burnt up, and we should that night be turned out naked;
whether I could cheerfully resign all to God; and whether I so saw
that all was his, that I could fully consent to his will, in being
deprived of it? and that I found, so far as I could judge, an entire
resignation to his will, and felt that, if he should thus strip me of
every thing, I had nothing to say, but should, I thought, have an
entire calm and rest in God, for it was his own, and not mine. After
this, Mr. Phelps gave us an account of his own feelings, during a
journey from which he had just returned; and then Mr. Pomeroy broke
forth in the language of joy, and thankfulness, and praise, and
continued speaking to us nearly an hour, leading us all the time to
rejoice in the visible presence of God, and to adore his infinite
goodness and condescension. He concluded by saying, `I would say more
if I could; but words were not made to express these things.' This
reminded me of the words of Mrs. Rowe:
`More I would speak, but all my words are faint: Celestial Love, what
eloquence can paint? No more, by mortal words, can be expressed; But
vast Eternity shall tell the rest:'
And my former impressions of heavenly and divine things were renewed
with so much power, and life, and joy, that my strength all failed me,
and I remained for some time faint and exhausted. After the people had
retired, I had a still more lively and joyful sense of the goodness
and all-sufficiency of God, of the pleasure of loving him, and of
being alive and active in his service, so that I could not sit still,
but walked the room for some time, in a kind of transport. The
contemplation was so refreshing and delightful, so much like a
heavenly feast within the soul, that I felt an absolute indifference
as to any external circumstances; and, according to my best
remembrance, this enlivening of my spirit continued so, that I slept
but little that night.
"The next day, being Thursday, between ten and eleven o'clock, and a
room full of people being collected, I heard two persons give a minute
account of the enlivening and joyful influences of the Holy Spirit on
their own hearts. It was sweet to me to see others before me in their
divine attainments, and to follow after them to heaven. I thought I
should rejoice to follow the negro servants in the town to heaven.
While I was thus listening, the consideration of the blessed
appearances there were of God's being there with us, affected me so
powerfully, that the joy and transport of the preceding night were
again renewed. After this they sang a hymn, which greatly moved me,
especially the latter part of it, which speaks of the ungratefulness
of not having the praises of Christ always on our tongues. Those last
words of the hymn seemed to fasten on my mind, and as I repeated them
over, I felt such intense love to Christ, and so much delight in
praising him, that I could hardly forbear leaping from my chair and
singing aloud for joy and exultation. I continued thus extraordinarily
moved until about one o'clock, when the people went away."
I am well aware, that very different views will be formed of the
preceding narrative, by different individuals. Those who have no
conception of what is meant by the religion of the heart, will
doubtless pronounce it the offspring of a diseased body, or a
distempered brain. Others, who profess the religion of Christ, but
whose minds usually come in contact with nothing which is not merely
palpable--with nothing but what they can either see, or hear, or feel,
or taste--will probably regard it as the effect of mere enthusiasm.
While others, who are both more intellectual and more spiritual in
their objects of contemplation, will at once perceive that the state
of mind therein described, is one to which they themselves are chiefly
or wholly strangers; and will therefore very naturally and rationally
wish to learn somewhat more minutely the circumstances of the
individual, who was the subject of these spiritual discoveries, as
well as their actual effect upon her character. On these points, the
testimony of Mr. Edwards is full and explicit; and from his authority
we state the following facts.
At this time, Mrs. Edwards had been long, in an uncommon manner,
growing in grace, and rising by very sensible degrees to higher love
to God, weanedness from the world, and mastery over sin and
temptation, through great trials and conflicts, and long-continued
struggling and fighting with sin, and earnest and constant prayer and
labour in religion, and engagedness of mind in the use of all means,
attended with a great exactness of life; and this growth had been
attended not only with a great increase of religious affections, but
with a most visible alteration of outward behaviour; particularly in
living above the world, and in a greater degree of stedfastness and
strength in the way of duty and self-denial: maintaining the christian
conflict against temptations, and conquering from time to time under
great trials; persisting in an unmoved, untouched calm and rest, under
the changes and accidents of time, such as seasons of extreme pain and
apparent hazard of immediate death. These transports did not arise
from bodily weakness, but were greatest in the best state of health.
They were accompanied with a lively sense of the greatness of God, and
her own littleness and vileness; and had abiding effects in the
increase of the sweetness, rest, and humility, which they left upon
the soul, and in a new engagedness of heart to live to the honour of
God, and to watch and fight against sin. They were attended with no
enthusiastical disposition to follow impulses or supposed revelations,
nor with any appearance of spiritual pride; but on the contrary with a
very great increase of meekness and humility, and a disposition in
honour to prefer others, as well as with a great aversion to judging
others, and a strong sense of the importance of moral, social duties.
They were accompanied with an extraordinary sense of the awful majesty
of God, so as frequently to take away the bodily strength; with a
sense of the holiness of God, as of a flame infinitely pure and
bright, so as oftentimes to overwhelm soul and body, with an
extraordinary view of the infinite terribleness of his wrath, of the
exceeding sinfulness of her own heart, and of a desert of that wrath
for ever; with an intense sorrow for sin, so as entirely to prostrate
the strength of the body; with a clear certainty of the truth of the
great things revealed in the gospel; with an overwhelming sense of the
glory of the work of redemption, and the way of salvation by Jesus
Christ, of the glorious harmony of the divine attributes appearing
therein, as that wherein mercy and truth are met together, and
righteousness and peace have kissed each other; with a sight of the
glorious sufficiency of Christ, a constant immovable trust in God, an
overwhelming sense of his glorious unsearchable wisdom, a sweet
rejoicing at his being infinitely and unchangeably happy, independent,
and all-sufficient, at his reigning over all, and doing his own will
with uncontrollable power and sovereignty; with a delightful sense of
the glory of the Holy Spirit as the great Comforter; with intense
desires for the honour and glory of God's name, a clear and constant
preference of it, not only to her own temporal interests, but to her
spiritual comfort; with a willingness to live and die in spiritual
darkness, if the honour of God required it, a great lamenting of
ingratitude, intense longings and faintings after higher love to
Christ, and greater conformity to him--particularly to be more perfect
in humility and adoration; with great delight in singing praises to
God and Jesus Christ, a desire that this present life might be one
continued song of praise, and an overcoming pleasure at the thought of
spending eternity in that exercise; with a living by faith in a very
unusual manner; with a uniform distrust of her own strength, and a
great dependence on God for help; with intense longings that all
Christians might be fervent in love, and active in the service of God;
with taking pleasure in watchfulness and toil, self-denial and bearing
the cross; with a melting compassion for those who were in a state of
nature, and for Christians under darkness, a universal benevolence to
all mankind, a willingness to endure any suffering for the conversion
of the impenitent--her compassion for them being often to that degree,
that she could find no support nor rest, but in going to God and
pouring out her soul in prayer for them; with earnest desires that the
then existing work of Divine grace might be carried on with greater
purity, and freedom from all bitter zeal, censoriousness, spiritual
pride, and angry controversy, and that the kingdom of Christ might be
established through the earth, as a kingdom of holiness, peace, and
joy; with unspeakable delight in the thoughts of heaven, as a world of
love, where love shall be the saints' eternal food, where they shall
dwell in the light of love, and where the very air and breath will be
nothing but love; with intense love to the people of God, as to those
who will soon wear his perfect image; with earnest desires that others
might love God better than herself, and attain to higher degrees of
holiness; with a delight in conversing on the most spiritual and
heavenly things in religion, often engaging in such conversation, with
a degree of feeling too intense to be long endured; and with a lively
sense of the importance of charity to the poor, as well as of the need
which ministers have of the influences of the Holy Spirit, and earnest
longings and wrestlings with God for them in prayer. She had also,
according to Mr. Edwards, the greatest, fullest, longest continued,
and most constant assurance of the favour of God, and of a title to
future glory, that he ever saw any appearance of, in any
person;--enjoying, especially near the time in which he made this
statement, to use her own expression, the riches of Full Assurance; as
well as an uninterrupted, entire resignation to God, with respect to
health or sickness, ease or pain, life or death, and an entire
resignation of the lives of her nearest earthly friends. These things
were attended with a constant, sweet peace and serenity of soul,
without a cloud to interrupt it, a continual rejoicing in all the
works of nature and providence, a wonderful access to God by prayer,
sensibly conversing with him, as much as if Christ were here on earth;
frequent, plain, sensible, and immediate answers of prayer, all tears
wiped away, all former troubles and sorrows of life forgotten,
excepting sorrow for sin, doing every thing for God and his glory,
doing it as the service of love, with a continual uninterrupted
cheerfulness, peace, and joy. "O how good," she once observed, "is it
to work for God in the day time, and at night to lie down under his
smiles." Instead of slighting the means of grace in consequence of
these discoveries, she was never more sensible of her need of
instruction; instead of regarding herself as free from sin, she was
led by her clearer sight of the Divine holiness, to perceive more
fully the sinfulness of her own heart; instead of neglecting the
business of life, she performed it with greater alacrity, as a part of
the service of God--declaring that, when thus done, it was as
delightful as prayer itself. At the same time, she discovered an
extreme anxiety to avoid every sin, and to discharge every moral
obligation, was most exemplary in the performance of every social and
relative duty, exhibited great inoffensiveness of life and
conversation, great meekness, gentleness, and benevolence of spirit,
and avoided, with remarkable conscientiousness, all those things which
she regarded as failings in her own character.
To those who, after reading this statement of facts, still regard the
preceding narrative as the offspring of enthusiasm, we shall draw our
reply from Mr. Edwards himself: "Now if such things are enthusiasm,
and the offspring of a distempered brain; let my brain be possessed
evermore of that happy distemper! If this be distraction; I pray God
that the world of mankind may all be seized with this benign, meek,
beneficent, beatific, glorious distraction! What notion have they of
true religion, who reject what has here been described? What shall we
find to correspond with these expressions of Scripture, The peace of
God, that passeth all understanding: Rejoicing with joy unspeakable,
and full of glory: God's shining into our hearts, to give the light of
the knowledge of the glory of God, in the face of Jesus Christ: With
open face, beholding as in a glass the glory of God, and being changed
into the same image, from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the
Lord: Being called out of darkness into marvellous light: and having
the day-star arise in our hearts? What, let me ask, if these things
that have been mentioned do not correspond with these expressions;
what else can we find that does correspond with them?"
Mr. Edwards adds, that he had witnessed many instances, in Northampton
and elsewhere, of other persons, which were in general of the same
kind with these, though not so high in degree, in any instance; and,
in many of them, not so pure and unmixed, or so well regulated. In
some individuals, who discovered very intense religious affections,
there was obviously a great mixture of nature with grace, and in some
a sad degenerating of religious affections; yet, in most instances,
they were uniform in their character, and obviously the result of
fervent piety.
That such full and clear discoveries of the Divine excellency and
glory, as those recited in the preceding narrative, are uncommon, is
unhappily too true: still they are far from being singular; for
accounts of a similar nature may be found in the private diaries of
men of distinguished piety, in almost every age of the church. [25]
They are not however probably more uncommon, than are great
attainments in piety; and, when enjoyed by those who have made such
attainments, ought, in no respect, to be regarded as surprising. There
is certainly in God a goodness and a glory, infinitely surpassing the
comprehension of the highest created beings. This goodness and glory,
which constitutes the Divine beauty and loveliness, God is able to
reveal to the mind of every intelligent creature, as far as his
faculties extend. If the mind, to which this revelation is made, has a
supreme relish for holiness; the discovery of this spiritual beauty of
the Divine mind will communicate to it an enjoyment, which is pure and
heavenly in its nature; and the degree of this enjoyment, in every
case, will be proportioned to the measure of the faculties, and to the
fulness of the discovery. This is obviously true in the heavenly
world. God there reveals his glory--not in all its infinite
brightness: this, he cannot do to a created intelligence: he reveals
it--in as strong an effulgence as the minds of saints and angels can
endure. Were a revelation, equally clear and full, to be made to one
of us here on earth, it would obviously overwhelm and destroy the life
of the body; for John, even when he beheld the glorified body of
Christ, fell at his feet as dead. In proportion as an individual is
possessed of holiness, so much more near does he come to God, and so
much more clear and distinct is his perception of his true character.
"If a man love me," says Christ, "he will keep my words; and my Father
will love him, and we will come unto him, and make our abode with
him." Such discoveries of the Divine beauty and glory are therefore
the promised reward, as well as the natural consequence, of
distinguished holiness; and a well authenticated narrative, of the
manner in which they were made, in a given instance, even if they were
unusual in degree, instead of exciting our distrust or surprise,
should lead us, with a noble emulation, to "press forward towards the
mark, for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus."
_________________________________________________________________
[24] Probably the 91st Hymn of the 2d Book, beginning with "O the
delights, the heavenly joys, The glories of the place."
[25] As examples of this nature, the reader is referred to the
writings of Flavel, L. Baxter, and Brainerd, and of Mr. Edwards
himself.