That I should do so, and sin, by going into a place forbidden to me, and that in such a time and manner, and upon such an occasion; which would have been both sinful and shameful: See Poole "Neh_6:11".
That they might reproach me as a coward, and conscious of my own guilt, that so they might make me contemptible and odious, both to my own people, and to the king of Persia.