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This Chapter Verse Commentaries:
NASB (UPDATED) TEXT: Eph_6:4
4Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
Eph_6:4
NASB, NKJV,
NRSV "fathers"
TEV, NJB "parents"
The Greek text has "fathers." The modern English dynamic equivalent translations (TEV and NJB) have widened the meaning because of Eph_6:2, where both father and mother are mentioned. However, in the larger context of Eph_5:21 to Eph_6:9, Paul addresses first the three groups who had no social rights-wives, children, slaves-and then addresses the ones who had all the rights-husbands, fathers, and masters. There is a spiritual responsibility for every member of a Christian home.
▣ "do not provoke" This is a present active imperative with the negative particle which usually means to stop an act already in process (cf. Col_3:21). Like Eph_5:25, this was the needed balance, in the Greco-Roman world, and ours. Fathers are not ultimate authorities, but Christian stewards of their families.
Christian fathers must understand their stewardship role in the lives of their children. Fathers are not to teach personal preferences, but spiritual truths. The goal is not parental authority, but passing on God's authority to children. There is always a generation gap, but never a divine authority gap. Children do not have to reflect parental habits, choices, or lifestyle to be pleasing to God. We must be careful of the desire to mold our children into our current cultural understanding or to reflect our personal preferences.
As a local pastor near a large state school, I noticed that many of the wildest young people came from conservative Christian homes which allowed them no personal choices or freedoms. Freedom is a heady experience and must be introduced in responsible stages. Christian children must develop lives based on personal conviction and faith, not second-hand parental guidelines.
▣ "bring them up" This is a present active imperative which comes from the same word root, "to feed to maturity," as in Eph_5:29. As it is the husband's responsibility to continue to help his wife grow to spiritual maturity and giftedness, he is also to help his children reach their full spiritual maturity and giftedness (cf. Eph_4:7).
NASB, NRSV "in the discipline and instruction of the Lord"
NKJV "in the training and admonition of the Lord"
TEV "Christian discipline and instruction"
NJB "correct them and guide them as the Lord does"
The first term is from the Greek root for "child" and refers to the parental training of children (cf. Heb_12:5; Heb_12:7-8; Heb_12:11) and for the Lord's training of believers (cf. 2Ti_3:16).
The second term is the general term for warning, correction, or admonition (cf. 1Co_10:11; Tit_3:10). The training of children in the faith was a major emphasis of Judaism (cf. Deu_4:9; Deu_6:7-9; Deu_6:20-25; Deu_11:18-21; Deu_32:46). Parental training recognizes the necessity of passing on the personal faith and the Scriptural truths of God, not the personal preferences, or cultural opinions of parents, to the next generation.